Questions Answered
My baby doesn't like my home cooking!
I seem to spend every spare moment of the day (and I don't have many) cooking for my eight month old, Emily, who spits everything back at me. Then, when I open a jar of puréed baby food, she eats it as fast as I can feed her. Does it do her any harm to have the odd jar of baby food so I can keep my sanity?
This is a very frustrating but common concern! Do take heart from the fact that you are doing exactly the right thing in persevering with the food you're offering, and make sure any leftovers go into the freezer as they will be very handy once Emily does get used to different textures.
Your daughter is at an ideal age for babies to start eating coarser textures and lumpier foods, but it really is a learning process. It's common for babies to initially prefer commercial puréed baby foods, which have an extremely fine texture that is virtually impossible to achieve at home. There are a few strategies you can use to help your daughter get used to more coarsely-textured food:
Try serving your home-cooked foods when Emily is particularly hungry.
Mix a little home-cooked food into the commercial baby food, gradually increasing the proportion of home-cooked food each day. Offer Emily ‘second stage' commercial baby foods, which contain lumps, mashing them a little yourself if necessary. Many children enjoy finger foods before they start eating baby foods containing a mixture of lumps and smoother textures. You could try offering thinly sliced, buttered toast soldiers, chopped banana or well-cooked pasta shapes. Try, try and try again!
In the meantime, take heart from the fact that, while home-made is certainly best, the occasional jar of commercial baby food will do no harm. There are quite strict guidelines for baby food production (prohibiting the addition of salt, for example), so they do make a good back-up if it's been a particularly tough day, or for when you're out and about.
Question answered by our nutritionist, Registered Dietitian, Fiona Hinton.
What has happened to my happy, easy-to-settle baby?
My ten week old daughter has been following the CLB routines really well. By eight weeks she was starting to sleep through three or four nights a week to near 7am. I took this to be a signal that she was ready to drop her middle of the night feed, which was usually between 4am and 5am. On the nights she wakes in the middle of the night I have been trying to settle her with cool boiled water and a cuddle. This can take up to an hour however, and then she will usually wake again around 6am, and refuses to settle back to sleep despite being fed. I really do not want to back-track and feed her in the night again, but she has gone from being a really happy baby who settled well at all her sleep times, to a very grumpy baby who now takes ages to settle to sleep both in the day and at night.
If a baby reaches a couple of months and is waking at the same time every night, and shows no sign of sleeping longer in the night, despite having a full feed at 10pm, then it may be that his waking is due to habit and not hunger. In which case I do advise trying the core night method, which involves settling the baby with cool boiled water/cuddles etc. In my experience, if the waking was due to habit, I usually found that the baby would settle back to sleep very quickly once offered the water/cuddle, and within a couple of nights he would be sleeping a longer spell and no longer waking at the earlier time. As this has not happened with your baby I would strongly advise that you go back to feeding her in the night. The most important thing to remember about establishing good sleeping habits at night, is that the baby should not be awake for long periods of time in the night. At present your baby is losing a lot of sleep between 3am and 7am which is causing her to become overtired during the day. Overtiredness can lead to early morning waking and unsettled daytime sleep. An overtired baby will usually need assisting to sleep which can also lead to the wrong sleep associations, causing yet further sleep problems.
Try not to see feeding your baby in the night as back-tracking. Offer her a feed the minute she wakes so that she settles back to sleep quickly. The better she sleeps at night, the easier it will be for her to stay happily awake during the day. Remember, that the amount of daytime sleep your baby has will also dictate as to how soon she begins to sleep through the night.
In addition, when she starts to sleep through to nearer 7am again, try to ensure that you increase her daytime feeds, so that she is still taking the same amount of milk as she was, but divided into the feeds she has between 6-7am and 11pm. If you do not increase the daytime feeds, then sleeping through will become very random again.
Question answered by Gina and the team.
Should I leave my seven-week-old baby to cry-down when he wakes after only a 45 min lunchtime nap?
My 7 week old son is following the CLB routines happily except for the lunchtime nap. He rarely sleeps more than 45 minutes. I did follow advice on the website of assisting him to sleep by taking him for a walk every day for several days, and he would then sleep the full two hours, but it is impossible for me to do this every day. I have also tried using the crying-down method, to see if he would settle himself back to sleep, but he just works himself up into a hysterical state of crying and then takes ages to calm down. Do you think he will eventually learn to settle himself back to sleep if I leave him crying long enough ?
I would strongly advise that you do not leave your baby to cry for any length of time when he wakes up after 45 minutes at the lunchtime nap. Crying down is something that I recommend for babies who are overtired and fighting sleep. A baby who cries down will usually cry on and off for around five to ten minutes, then sleep the full naptime, or at night until the next feed is due. I would not recommend that you leave your baby to cry when he wakes up after 45 minutes at the lunchtime nap, as I do not feel that the problem is being caused by overtiredness. Leaving a baby of this age to cry for lengthy periods will not help establish healthy sleep habits, but will only teach them to cry.
I suggest that you offer a feed at 10-10.30am, and then offer your son a top-up feed prior to his lunchtime nap. When he wakes after the 45 minutes, offer him a feed again. Treat this feed like a night feed and see if you can settle him back to sleep. If he refuses to go back to sleep, get him up and lay him in his pram or bouncy chair downstairs. At 2pm offer him a further feed to keep his feeding on track. You will probably find that he will need another nap around 2-2.30pm. At this age I usually advise a shorter nap of 30-40 minutes, followed by a further nap of 30-40 minutes around 4.15-4.30pm so that he does not become overtired at bedtime. Although it may take several weeks, I think you will find that you son will start to sleep longer at the lunchtime nap. Once he starts to sleep longer at lunchtime on a more regular basis, then on the days he does wake up after 45 minutes you can try leaving him for a short spell to see if he will settle himself back to sleep.
He is doing incredibly well settling at all his other sleep times, and I am fairly sure that given time he will start to sleep longer at lunchtime.
Question answered by Gina and the team.
Quantities of milk in a tablespoon of yoghurt
How much milk is two tablespoons of yoghurt worth? And what about cheese?
This is something that all parents ask. While it's not difficult to estimate food portions or suitable amounts for adults, it is trickier when you're looking at baby-sized portions. As a rule of thumb, 210ml of milk (a medium-sized cup or about 7oz) is equivalent to 125g yoghurt (4½oz, or the size of most small pots) or about 30g cheese (1oz, or a piece about the size of a matchbox). Thus, for smaller eaters, 100ml of milk (about 3½oz) will be equal to a half-tub of yoghurt (or the size of some smaller tubs marketed for young children), or to ½oz of cheese. In terms of tablespoons of yoghurt, two tablespoons of yoghurt will be approximately equal to three tablespoons of milk (50ml or 2oz), or to about 7g of cheese (¼oz). For your reference, there are 14 tablespoons of milk in a 210ml serving, about two per ounce.
Question answered by our nutritionist, Registered Dietitian, Fiona Hinton.
Night-time and early-morning waking
My son, aged nearly one, year has followed the CLB routines really well and slept brilliantly, until a couple of weeks ago, when he started to wake earlier and earlier, reaching a point where we were starting the day at 5.45am. Things have got even worse and he is now waking up once or twice a night. When I go to him he has usually kicked off his blanket, and is sitting up in the cot, and will not settle back to sleep unless I lay him back down and tuck him back in. I know the wakings are not being caused by hunger as he eats fantastically. I dropped the morning nap a couple of months ago when he started to cut back on his lunchtime nap. He now sleeps just over two hours at lunchtime, and goes to bed at 6.45pm so I know he is not overtired. I have two other children and these repeated night wakings and early-morning waking are really taking their toll on the whole family - please help.
By the age of one, a baby is well past the age of needing to be tucked in during the night. By continuing to settle your baby down to his sleeping position and tucking him in, you have, without realising it, created the wrong sleeping association. All babies come into a light sleep several times a night, and some even wake up for short spells. It is normal and natural for a baby to change sleep positions during these spells of light sleep. Because your son has not learned to settle himself back to sleep from the position he finds himself in when he comes into light sleep, he has become reliant on you laying him back down, and tucking him in again, in order to get back to sleep.
I suggest that you replace the lightweight sleeping bag and blanket with a warmer sleeping bag, so that your son has no blankets to displace and is free to move into his chosen sleep position. When you put him in his cot at sleep times I suggest that you put him in either standing up or sitting down, and then teach him how to lie down. If you put him in the cot standing up, encourage him to hold onto the cot spars with both hands, and with your hands around his gently help him lower himself down into the cot. When he reaches the sitting position encourage him to lie down in a sleeping position of his choice. Use the same words each time you do this, something short and simple like "it's sleepy time now, lie down". Keep repeating the words and initially give him some assistance with getting into the position. At his age he should learn to settle himself down to a sleeping position very quickly.
Once he can settle himself down to sleep, and is settling himself back to sleep during the night, if he still is waking early in the morning I suggest that you cut back even more on his daytime sleep. At this age, too much daytime sleep is usually the cause of early-morning waking, as opposed to overtiredness caused by not getting enough daytime sleep.
I advise that you aim for a 7pm bedtime, as any sleep before 7pm should be counted as daytime sleep. If he still continues to wake before 6am, then I suggest that you cut his daytime sleep back to one hour 45 minutes at lunchtime. All babies are different in the amount of sleep they need, and I personally believe that your son is one of those babies who needs less daytime sleep if he is to sleep well at night. If overtiredness was the cause of the early-morning waking then the problem would be resolved within a few days, simply by putting the baby to bed early or allowing more daytime sleep. From past experience you know that cutting out the morning nap fairly early on did in fact help his lunchtime sleep. Therefore, I think you can safely assume that your son is one that needs less, not more, daytime sleep in order to sleep well at night.
Question answered by Gina and the team.
How to stop the bedtime bottle
How do I get my two year old to stop taking a bottle at night? He will not go to sleep with out it.
At the age of two your son should ideally be self-settling. However at the moment your son associates sleep with his bottle. He should also be having his bedtime milk out of a cup by this age. The other concern is his teeth, as he will not have cleaned his teeth before going to sleep.
If you spend a fortnight gradually reducing the amount of milk you offer your son out of a bottle every night, by 1oz every two nights, you should find that he can manage quite well without it. Once you have reduced the milk in his bottle to just 2oz, take a beaker of milk up with you and offer that to him if he wants more milk after he has finished his bottle. You can read him his bedtime story while he has his milk.
Then get him into the routine of cleaning his teeth. After cleaning his teeth, pop him into his bed - without his bottle. He may fuss for a while but be firm and tell him there is no more milk until morning time.
If he starts to refuse milk from the beaker at night time, do not be tempted to go back to giving him the bottle. If you are concerned that he will not have enough milk in his daily diet try including milk in his meals through the day. This is easy to do if he has milk with his breakfast cereal, a yogurt with his lunch and maybe a milky pudding after his tea. He can also have a drink of milk from his beaker when he wakes up in the morning and again while having his story with you at bedtime.
To keep up your son's fluid intake encourage him to drink water from his beaker or cup. Try not to get into the habit of adding fruit juice or cordials to his water, as some of these are very high in sugar.
Question answered by Linda Russell, www.parentcoachingstudio.com.
Starting to wake twice a night
Up to the age of six weeks, my son was only waking once in the night, usually between 2 and 3am, feeding well and settling back to sleep until nearer 7am. For the last 10 days he has been waking twice a night, usually around 2am and then again at 5am.
Babies go through a growth spurt at six weeks and this may be what has triggered the twice a night waking. I suggest that you try giving a split feed at the late feed until this problem is resolved and he is back to waking once in the night again. By having him awake longer and giving him a slightly bigger feed he should begin to sleep one longer stretch in the night again.
For the late-evening split feed to be effective, it is important to begin to wake your baby by 9.45pm and make sure he is fully awake before feeding him. Turn on the lights and remove any bed covers. Babies can be sleepy at this time of day so you may need to undo his sleep suit and expose his legs to the air to fully wake him. Offer him the first breast or as much as he will take from the bottle. Then allow him to spend some time kicking on his play mat, but do not over-stimulate him by talking to him too much at this time. Keep a close eye on him for signs of tiredness. Between 10.45 and 11pm you should take him to the bedroom, change his nappy, dim the lights, and offer the second breast. If you are bottle feeding he should be offered a small top-up feed of freshly warmed milk - do nor re-heat any leftover milk from his earlier feed. Ensure he is well winded and settled back in his cot by 11.15pm, making sure he is well tucked in, and that the sheet and blanket go under the mattress enough that he cannot kick his covers off in the night, which is another reason that babies often start to wake earlier in the night.
Question answered by Gina in The Contented Baby's First Year.
Refusing third milk-feed of the day
My baby is 9 months old and has happily had 3 milk feeds a day of approx 180-210ml (6-7 oz) each of formula since he was 6 months. He is now getting very fussy and fretful at his bedtime bottle, sometimes taking as little as 90ml (3 oz) which has resulted in him waking earlier than 7am, looking for a feed. I have tried cutting back on his 2.30 pm feed but he gets very irritable and looks for his tea nearer 4.30 instead of 5pm.
Many babies do cut back or refuse a third milk feed at this stage. Obviously it is better if it is the mid-afternoon one and not the last feed of the day.
ontinue to give your baby a reduced feed in the middle of the day but try offering him it at 3pm instead of 2.30pm, and bring his tea forward to 4.45pm. Once he has increased his bedtime feed for several days you can try pushing his tea-time solids back to 5pm. Do this gradually by two or three minutes, every three days.
If the above doesn't work, it is also worth looking at the amount of solids you are giving your baby at tea time. If he has more than 8 tablespoons of solids, try cutting back slightly, as this is another cause of babies cutting back too hard on their bedtime milk feed.
Another reason for cutting back on the bedtime milk feed is overtiredness. It is at this age that many babies are beginning to crawl and pull themselves up. This extra physical activity can make them very overtired at bedtime. It may be that your baby needs an extra 15 minutes sleep at lunchtime, so that he is not overtired at bedtime. If he refuses the extra sleep you may find that bringing his bedtime routine forward by 15 minutes will help.
If none of the above works, try cutting out the mid-afternoon feed altogether and replacing it with a drink of well-diluted juice or water and a snack, so he can get through until teatime. If he then drinks 180ml (6 oz) in the morning and 180ml (6 oz) in the evening, he will have reached the minimum amount. Extra milk on his cereal and in cooking should then easily meet his requirements.
Question answered by Gina in The Contented Little Baby Book of Weaning.
Separation Anxiety - returning to work
My six-and-a-half-month-old baby has always been very happy, and would go to anyone. However, recently she has started to fuss if I leave the room, and positively howls if I try to hand her to someone else. She is also waking more in the night. I am becoming rather anxious about this, as I am due to return to work in a few months' time, and worry that she is going to be miserable with a childminder.
By the age of six months, babies begin to realise they are separate from their mothers and may show signs of separation anxiety or stranger anxiety. The happy, contented baby who was so easy-going and relaxed and would go to anyone suddenly becomes clingy, anxious and demanding. This is a totally normal part of a baby's development, and is usually most obvious around nine months. Although it is very exhausting for parents, this stage rarely lasts long. The following guidelines can help make this difficult period less stressful and hopefully keep any sudden night-time waking to a minimum.
As you are returning to work it is important that your baby gets accustomed to being left with someone for short spells. She should be gradually left for longer and longer periods until she is happy to be left for the length of time you will be apart once you go back to work. Ideally she should have a settling-in period with the childminder (or nursery) of a month - and a minimum of two weeks - before you go back to work.
It is also important to get her used to large groups and new experiences long before you start back at work. Try to arrange regular play dates with a small group of the same mothers and babies. Once she appears to be happy and responding to the regular faces, increase the number of people and vary the venues.
When you are confident that your baby is happy with her carer, don't prolong the goodbye. A hug and a reminder that you will be back soon is enough. Using the same words and approach each time you say goodbye will, in the long-term, be more reassuring than going back to try to calm her. During this period, instruct your baby's carer that she must not be subjected to too many different new things at once or to handling by strangers. The calmer and more predictable her routine, the more quickly she will get over her feelings of anxiety.
Between nine and twelve months many babies develop a need for a comforter at sleep times, usually a special blanket, cloth or toy. If you decide to give your baby a comforter in bed, it is important that you allow her to have it only at nap times, and that she is not allowed to drag it around during the day. It is also a good idea to purchase a duplicate to allow for frequent washing or in case it becomes damaged or lost.
Question answered by Gina in The Complete Sleep Guide.
How to add variety in fussy toddler's diet
My son, age 11 months, has turned out to be a bit of a fussy eater. For instance, one taste of a meal with garlic in it and he spits it up and he is not that keen on tomato based dishes... this is annoying to say the least, as a lot of our favourite meals include garlic and tomatoes. However, he does love potatoes, meat and most vegetables... just plain, plain, plain. He's not a fan of cheese either . He does like barley e.g. the beef and barley pot supper or barley risottos and will eat risotto rice... maybe it's a texture thing rather than taste? So most days he gets potatoes with different vegetables... is this OK? Is it varied enough? Plus it's a bit limiting for my husband and I as we eat the same thing and I don't really have time to go making separate meals for him. I would welcome any thoughts or suggestions.
I expect many mums will be envious of you having a son who is keen on vegetables, plain or not. However it is frustrating to have a child who isn't keen on the usual family meals. Garlic does have a strong flavour, and this may be putting your son off. Children have a much more sensitive sense of taste than adults, which may be why babies are happy to gobble up baby rice that adults would consider to be much too bland to swallow. You might try cooking a smaller dish of a family meal for your son at the same time as you make yours, using all the same ingredients but omitting the garlic. If you can eat some with your son, that might also help to encourage him.
I'm pleased that he is having a variety of vegetables, and you mention that meat is not a problem so I assume he is enjoying a range of foods from this food group too. It seems that he is happy to eat a number of different starchy carbohydrate foods, though potato is the usual one. I would encourage you to offer him a variety of foods from this group, both to expand the range of foods he enjoys and because some contain slightly different nutrients to others. Apart from potatoes, the starchy carbohydrate foods are almost all grains, from common ones like wheat and rice (in all their forms) to those less commonly eaten, such as barley, quinoa, millet or buckwheat. Your son probably already eats bread made from wheat, but could also try couscous or pasta as more 'dinner'-type options. As well as risotto rice, which he already enjoys, he might like the nutty taste of brown rice. You could also try sweet potato in place of potato - it's lovely mashed with a squeeze of fresh orange juice.
There's no harm in offering the grain foods plain to start with - my younger son prefers plain pasta, rice and couscous to any with a sauce. Try them as an accompaniment to meat and vegetables, just as you would put potatoes on the plate. Most grain foods, such as quinoa or pasta can also be cooled and presented as a salad, maybe with chopped cucumber, sweetcorn kernels and tinned salmon or tuna mixed in. Offering a cold rather than a hot evening meal, particularly as the weather turns warmer, might encourage him to try something new. As a bonus, increasing the variety of starchy carbohydrate foods may encourage your son to experiment with other tastes and textures, hopefully leading to all of you enjoying the same, more adult, family meals.
Question answered by Fiona Hinton, Registered Dietitian.
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